Wednesday, March 07, 2007

Hillaryonics: A Disease Sweeping the Nation

Let this be the first notice (at least as far as I know) of a new syndrome sweeping America called Hillaryonics, named of course after our current Democratic presidential frontrunner.

Hillaryonics, as I define it, is an irrational fear of foreigners, particularly their capital. It is the science, no make that the art, of looking back to that lovely time in America when unions got what they demanded, airlines were able to charge exorbitant fares with the assistance of government, and the American consumer was obliged to buy a car that cost too much, ran too little and was design challenged.

Hillaryonics is also characterized by excessive jealousy and/or fear of those who earned their wealth rather than inheriting it. As such the malady encourages one to take from the ugly rich, like investment bankers, and give to the beautiful poor, such as performance artists and ballerinas.

Hillaryonics also has been known to actually alter a person’s speech pattern and add or drop an accent depending on your latitude. The illness has even been found to modify one’s recollection of childhood. For example, during the latter stages of the disease, individuals who grew up in opulence have been known to discuss the shame of growing up in an economically segregated community and having to shop at the Wal-Mart for their back to school clothes.

Oddly, the symptoms of Hillaryonics disappear when in the presence of rich Hollywood types. Unfortunately, most of those infected with the disease do not have the resources to regularly travel to southern California to battle bouts of Hillaryonics.

What are the first symptoms of the disease? You may have early stage Hillaryonics if you find yourself: a) working shorter and shorter work weeks, b) placing your economic hopes on winning the lottery, c) writing in Hugo Chavez for president in the 2008 elections, and d) flying in a private jet to attend a rally castigating big business for their contributions to global warming. A remedy can be found in Adam Smith's Wealth of Nations or Milton Friedman's Free to Choose.

Ernie Goss

1 comment:

Shawn said...

Hi Dr. Goss,

There is a classic argument in economics. Does society in fact function according to theories or are theories based off how society acts? Paul Krugman often argues a society is not yet functioning according to a theory. Thus, it isn't a theory which is flawed, but society is not properly adhering to the theory. Others argue theories sometimes cannot be practically applied.

Now comes the example. Bushnomics pursues large tax cuts to fund economic growth. If the poor and middle class do not reap the benefits they will soon look elsewhere. In the long run, economic reality wins. but in the short run, perception wins. Bush perceived to taxpayers the cuts were for all. After years of hearing this and not reaping the benefits, the poor and middle class are looking elsewhere. Even Ben Stein, a strong concervative economist, is calling for tax increases to help the middle and low income brackets.

Hillaryonics may be what you say, although I doubt it is a disease. After all, Clintonomics was great! However, people are showing they want anything but Bushonomics.

I read Freidman's Freedom to Choose. I always thought Japan's zero or really negative interest rates of the ninties proved Friedman's theory false.